The Chipmunk has Landed-The Leap of Stupidity

The Head Chipmunk landed safely on the Upper Canopy of the Forest today! Her leap of stupidity worked!

Seeing the Chipmunk soar above her head made the Golden Eagle suddenly take to flight to beat the HC to the Canopy. She decided to act all casual and not like a bird who had a lowly rodent go over her head but rather like a bird who had invited the Chipmunk up there to join her all along (yeah, right).

Once at the Canopy, the HC spoke to the Highest Condor and explained the situation (the situation the Golden Eagle had originally chosen to ignore). The Highest Condor listened with great interest, spread her great, broad wings and immediately promised the HC thousands of acorns for her to spend on solving her problem. The HC left feeling happy and satisfied and glad she took the chance to fly. The HC decided to slowly crawl and scamper the way down the tree instead of attempting to soar anymore. The Golden Eagle flew off in another direction....bitter and confused by the memory of the flying Chipmunk but fattened herself by the sudden increase in acorns.

When a Chipmunk becomes a Flying Squirrel

Sometimes, when she has no other choice because the Woodland Glen is a tangled mess of fallen tress, rubble and detritus that there is no room to walk or slither or hop, the Head Chipmunk climbs to the tallest tree she can find, above the Golden Eagle's nest and up to the highest branch....and leaps.

Only after she has left the safety of the tallest tree does the Chipmunk realize she is bound to the laws of gravity and that she doesn't have actual wings. There is a deep panic not only about the possibilities of the ground suddenly rushing up to greet her but also that going above the Golden Eagle's head is probably not a great idea.

But above the Golden Eagle's head is the only way to the magical "Upper Canopy" of the Forest where decisions are made and resources are handed out and sometimes, when the Golden Eagle is sleeping or refuses to carry messages from the Glen to the Canopy, the Chipmunk thinks she has no choice. So she leaps.

Courage and stupidity are hard to tell apart.

But what about the gravity? And the lack of wings? And the Golden Eagle who stares up from her nest with incredulity at the suddenly airborne Chipmunk (who's eyes are closed as she is frantically visualizing herself to be a flying squirrel)?

Stayed tuned. Maybe gravity will win. Maybe the Chipmunk will reach the Canopy before she splats on the forest floor. Maybe the Golden Eagle will take flight, pluck the Chipmunk from the air and tear her limb from limb before devouring her.

Who's Who and What's What

If you are new to the Glen here are the basics that you need to know:

The writer is the Department Chair of a medium sized department at a very large College in the United States. She was appointed Chair in 2015 and subsequently elected. It was a job she said she never wanted for one very good reason---she's an organizational disaster area. Turns out, she's more organized than almost everyone else (which is scary). She finds strength in the seemingly frantic chipmunk who races about with no known plan but in the end survives the coldest of winters while the awe inspiring bear or frightening snake only survive by sleeping through the whole damn thing. Chipmunks survive through ingenuity and serious amounts of group warmth. Also, a chipmunk is a cheerful little thing, is never deterred, doesn't take itself too seriously and never worries about gaining weight in its face.

Butterflies-students, old young, some gorgeous, some plain but all are fragile in their own right and need to be protected. The HC takes this job seriously though some butterflies do remind her a bit of annoying moths but she tries to forgive them.

The Golden Eagle-The Dean who's promotion led to the writer being appointed to HC in the first place. The Dean is a powerful woman of small stature who is a strong supporter of the HC and will dive into fire. However, she also has very sharp talons and is a tad capricious for the HC's liking. When hearing a bit about this writing experiment, she demanded to be called "'Golden Eagle' because  I am Chinese.....and be sure you write that part but be sure this is all anonymous".  The HC has no idea what that means. But Golden Eagle makes the HC laugh a lot.

Silver Eagle-The HC's mentor. A long term faculty member who has been the HC's go-to person since day one. She, along with Golden Eagle, keep the HC in check, take her for gluten free pizza when needed and regularly ask important questions like "did your mother drop you on your head or did you acquire this level of dumb all on your own?". 

Skunk/weasel/snakes-the evil doers in the department. They treat students like crap, don't do their work, are entitled, lie, scam and are every form of stinkiness one can imagine. In best cases they cross lines of civility, in worse cases they skirt the law. It's really hard to get rid of them.

Pigeons-less noxious then the above crew but none less irritating. The pigeon was inspired by a friend who posted the quote "Arguing with stupid people is like playing chess with a pigeon. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock the pieces over, shit on the board, and strut around like it's victorious." Yeah, some people the HC works with are pigeons.